Last day

Photo by Anna Tarazevich on

Today is my last day of freedom before I begin work at my new job. Well, it’s the job I am returning to after a 2+ year break between random jobs and finding where my true passion lays. To say I am not a little nervous would be an understatement. It feels good to be going back to a job I found myself loving and passionate about, but I do realize how real the burnout is. Mental health is my passion, but I realize I could be put in potentially dangerous situations due to bouts of psychosis and delusions.

I am, for those who don’t know, going back to work in a psych ward. This time around, I will be working with adults rather than children. I also am only working one day a week on Wednesday’s, 12 hour shifts. The money is pretty good, but less than what I was used to when I worked graveyard shifts for the agency. I will not be supervising at all, which is the job I had interviewed for, but it will be good to get my toes wet so to speak and see how I fare out.

I took this job in particular because it was day shift and I could pull nearly a grand per month working only one week total out of the month over the course of four weeks. Not to mention with my other new job at a retail store that I can work 20-30 hours per week before school starts to rake in all the cash to pay off debt.

This is gonna take a toll on my mental health, but I am running out of options and jobs to work at in the county. But in order to prove myself to my family, Diego, and others, failure is not an option. I need to succeed during the school year and the best way to do that is to get as much money now as I can to lower debt payments and survive on the littlest amount possible. I got a lot of people to prove wrong and this is how I do it; with tact and elegance.

Today isn’t supposed to be an overly busy day… I have to take a pair of Nikes to an Amazon locker because they didn’t fit me. I need to cancel my old gym membership and I have decided to go back to the Y so I can swim to help rehabilitate my foot that I just had surgery on. I applied to their Y scholarship and was able to get 50% off their young person membership price which makes the monthly pretty affordable for all the classes and amenities that they have.

I need to clean my room and bathroom at home, but I have been having issues with my lower back because my core strength is so low from being non weight bearing for so long. If I stand up for more than ten minutes, walking around doing stuff, my lower back begins to ache and I need to sit down sooner rather than later.

All in all, today should be a good day and I pray that it will be.

Much love,


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