Wrapping up my weekend, I am back in the lair with candy in hand writing to you on this Thursday night. I would say my weekend was pretty good. I got home around 5pm from Diego’s house and spent some time with my mom. We watched the new Kardashian show for a bit while we had a light dinner of baked potatoes and green beans. I did my cash envelope stuffing so I put $150 in my sinking funds and $100 toward my 100 envelope challenge, along with put some cash in my wallet for basic spending. I got another week until payday and I am looking forward to adding to my special savings challenges that I have going on.

A lot of people ask me why I budget using cash and don’t use my debit card often and that is because I save more money with cash. If I buy a Redbull for 3.29 and I get 1.71 back, I am not gonna spend that 1.71 I am gonna save it and put it toward groceries or shopping or whatever. If I used my debit card, I would just spend that 1.71 without thinking about it.

I now have YouTube playing in the background on my tv, have the essential oil diffuser going, and I am laying down writing. I took my meds not too long ago and today I felt pretty good. I think I have just been stressed with work so it makes me feel like I am going insane but it’s not true. It’s my head playing tricks on me. Because my meds have been stable for a while and I take them twice a day, I didn’t think anything was truly wrong with me other than I felt like I was gonna die.

I am legitimately surprised I haven’t quit my job yet or done anything too irrational. I enjoy my job but I still get fed up quickly so I’m surprised my fuse hasn’t snapped, and irrationally then quit my job. So let’s cross our fingers and hope the bipolar aggression and passive aggression goes away or at least is minimal.

I work 12-8pm the next two days with Easter Sunday off work. I think after that my schedule flips to working 6am-2:30pm for the next week which I’m honestly not stoked about. Sure getting off before 3pm is nice, but sleep. Enough said. I am hoping to shower, do my face scrub routine and do a little bit of reading tonight before I go to bed. Or maybe I will just go to bed. All good options…

I think we allow ourselves the self care that we think we deserve rather than what we actually need. I think that we allow ourselves maybe a hour or two per day to do what we really need to rejuvenate or refresh ourselves. Maybe not even that much time… maybe one Sunday we try to have a self care Sunday where you may do one thing that is self care oriented but then feel guilty about spending time on yourself instead of those around you.

I know today I felt like that; I felt guilty for sleeping in and taking a nap after brunch. But if I don’t do this shit, I will crash and burn.

ok that’s all I got for this soapbox but as always I love and care for you. You matter!

much love,

Dani