I finally got the call today. I do indeed have a job with my current employer at the mental health agency. I will be going full time, instead of picking up hours whenever I could. I am getting reimbursed administrative pay for when I was scheduled to work and couldn’t work. Since I am only scheduled 12 hours a week, I won’t be getting the overtime I had been pulling before but some money is better than no money. I think on the 19th, I will get 36 hours of pay for not working so I am very excited.

I am unsure where I am going or what I will be doing, but I know I will not be going back to the adult inpatient unit and I will be going to a much safer, cushy desk job. I am not sure how I feel besides being elated that I still have a job with the company. I am a little nervous about the unexpected and a little sad I won’t be returning to my job; as much shit as I gave it, I did love the people I met and the experiences I have had.

I found this good news out while I was at the mall. My mom has a convention to go to with my dad in January and needed a special outfit and we found her this pinkish purple dress that is tee length. I told her to hold off on shoes. It was a sleeveless dress and she had a fancy Calvin Klein sweater at home. I let her borrow my scrappy high heels in black that matched her sweater and she looked beautiful. I took a photo of her and to get her to smile, I told her to “think of my dad’s butt”. She laughed, but it got her to grin ear to ear.

I picked up a free sweater from Kohls that I “bought” with Kohls cash. I have a skirt coming but I gotta pick that up at a later date. I also have my impulse buys coming in the mail in the next few days. In addition, my glasses are coming soon! I got green glasses from Ann Taylor and they are emerald green tortoise colored. I had a pair just like them when I was 17 years old. I went to the gym and my purse got stolen and so was all my pain pills and glasses and wallet and car keys. I was livid. But mostly about my glasses because those were my absolute favorite.

Anyways today has been chill. I got kind of angry with my mom while shopping because I was hangry and being impatient. But she was being indecisive which I cannot stand when it comes to shopping. After about a hour, shopping stresses me out and I need to leave immediately. But then I got some food and was better.

Tomorrow I go back to Diego’s house to watch the dog while Diego’s at work and so I can do some homework. I am trying to get my five assignments due Sunday done by Friday so I have the weekend to mostly chill out and work on my university’s general scholarship application due in January. I am not sure if it is first come first serve, so if it is I better be the early bird.

I am anxious to go back to work but I am thankful for this “forced” vacation it has helped me in a lot of ways. I have been able to catch up on school and get rid of the burnout from being at home. I redid my resume today and sent it to HR so that they have a better idea of a position that I am qualified to be placed in.

I spent so much time fretting over nothing and now look, things are looking up! Will I ever stop worrying? Unlikely.

Much love,

Dani