I should be so lucky

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#Blogtober20 – Day 11

Luck is a weird thing to me. I usually only associate luck with gambling and with that, I was usually more lucky then not. My problem with gambling wasn’t the fact that I would lose a lot, quite the contrary. It was that I didn’t know when to walk away with my winnings; that is when the luck ran out.

But looking at luck in other aspects of life, I really should be so lucky. I got the world on a string and the world in the palm of my hand. The world is my oyster. I just got to make some things happen and then my luck would never run out.

Things I am fortunate to have:

Adequate health care; both physical and mental – I have access to medicine for my bipolar disorder and my bladder disease, Interstitial Cystitis. I have access to treatment for medical issues. I have access to therapy for whenever I can go back to in-person therapy.

Access to a second chance at education – I now have a chance to go to university and I’m going to try as much as humanly possible to do well with my SAT exam and so I can get into the school nearest my home with a good social work program.

A home – after I got kicked out of Diego’s house, I was terrified that I was going to become homeless, so my parent’s graciously reaccepted me back into their home. It’s not where I want to be forever, but it works in the meantime.

Freedom of religion – I have the right to worship whatever Higher Power I so choose, which I try not to take that for granted considering it is not a freedom world wide. I chose to worship the Christian God and nothing makes me happier than having this freedom.

I have been gambling free for a month on the 14th – This seems like it’s been the longest month in all of eternity, but I have almost made it a month without gambling. Three more days and then I will have my 30 days. It seems so obsolete, yet so important at the same time. Gambling destroyed my life. But I’m slowly building it back up. Yesterday I got to get out of the house by myself and had every opportunity there was to crutch my way to the casino or get some scratch tickets, but I deliberately chose not to do that. I didn’t want to lose everything I worked so hard for up to this point. And I thought about going, but didn’t. I am proud of myself. The choice was easy, but it won’t always be and I recognize that.

Music – THIS!!! Music is my everything and I don’t have any real musical talent, but I appreciate different musical elements like no other. In real life, I am constantly listening to music and I never have it off. I usually sleep with it on and wake up to cool, new sounds and go to sleep with sounds that make me feel at home.

I am grateful for my MacBook Pro – although it sounds silly, I finally have a real laptop to do my writing on and for that, I am super thankful. I can soon start making vlogs and posting them to YouTube, which I’m stoked about. It’s been a long time coming and I think I’m ready to expand the Precarious Aquarius brand and yeah, stay tuned for that!

I think that’s just about everything that I feel lucky to have. What about you? What makes you feel lucky or fortunate?

Much Love,


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