Honestly this post is already trash so if you want to skip reading this one, I am okay with that decision because honestly I wouldn’t read it either. Okay now that I have your attention, I am basically going to write every little word that pops in my brain and see how this goes. It could end well or it could end with a few less readers and that’s okay! I can’t impress everyone with my charming rhetoric and dashing good looks… that no one can see because this is a blog post. God, why do I try to be funny?! I am not naturally funny but I keep hearing from unexpected people in my life that my sarcasm is funny and my humor is unique. So I guess I got that going for me.

Uhh where to begin. I think I’ve been MIA from the blog as far as my physical health goes. Last Monday I believe I was throwing up stomach bile all day long. This is no different than any other day but when I take omeprazole, it usually stops heartburn, nausea, and vomiting in its tracks. So for the past seven days, I have been having heartburn from hell, nausea severely, vomiting every day and this pain in the center of my esophagus that makes it hard to eat. I am severely dehydrated and went to urgent care where they ordered stat bloodwork and stat abdominal ultrasound because they thought it was my gallbladder that needed to be taken out. My clients at work were very worried about me because I called out two days in a row. Luckily my gallbladder is fine but I couldn’t do bloodwork due to dehydration. But I have a GI appointment / consult at 9am today. Of course I am working graves until 7am today. But at least I’ll be up and at ’em for the appointment. I hope they can figure out all this pain and vomiting stuff because I am miserable. I can’t afford the ER bill which is the only reason I didn’t go. Also, my belly button and the surrounding stomach area is super hard to the touch so I am unsure what that means.

As far as mental health goes, I feel like I am going through a hypo manic state because I cleaned my room, took out all the trash and recycling, put on new sheets, made the bed. I am going through old paperwork and old mail and whatnot and I will soon clean off my painting desk and my desk desk. And all my laundry is done just need to put it all away in its respective home. So I did a lot especially with the severe abdominal pain symptoms; I mean granted, I was high the whole time I cleaned and maybe my mixed state helped move things along but I am not going to look a gift horse in the mouth!

Now all I need is to motivate myself to get caught back up on homework. I should have done shit last night at work but didn’t do anything. I think tonight… well it’s just after midnight and I get off at 7am so I might do my cooking cleaning and books for my clients after I finish typing this thing up and then devote my night to all my late assignments. I am not in jeopardy of failing… yet. But if I don’t get my act together, I am done for. No more school for Dani. Well, only if I fail and failure isn’t an option and I ain’t no quitter either.

I have to get an IUD on Thursday because my hormonal birth control is depleting all my lady hormones and at least with a copper IUD there is no hormones or very little so that should help with my moods and whatnot. I feel like my swinging hasn’t been bad even since we lowered the lithium back to 900mg per day. But my eye sight is still crap; I see double vision, floaters, and now my eye is twitching all the time like crazy but that could be something else; I am unsure. I am kind of scared about a new birth control because I have been on the pill gosh, eight years? But I am worried it will affect my interstitial cystitis. I mean one is a bladder illness that doesn’t affect where the IUD goes but knowing my luck, I will have some adverse reaction to it. I don’t know, maybe I am being chicken. But I am old and set in my ways about certain things!

Got a dentist appointment on Wednesday morning I think I have my first cavity in years which sucks but oh well. Hopefully they can fix it because it’s super sensitive. Oh exciting non medical news! I have a bachelors of social work information session via zoom on Friday morning. Along with a free oil change at the dealership. At least this way I can figure out when I will find out results if I got into the BSW program or not. I hope I get in but boy, that puts the pressure on from 0 to 120 real quick. But if I don’t get in, I will do my best to graduate with my general associates at the end of August but I hope my education doesn’t end there. But who knows, I certainly don’t.

Oh yeah I set up my planner for the month of May and I got these habit trackers that insert into any type of happy planner and I plan on tracking the following:

moods

meds

water intake

blog posts

weight check

self care

read scripture

period tracker (which will be helpful once I get the IUD because I really don’t menstruate now with my current birth control.

how many booze beverages I’ve had

if cannabis is used

and of course…

sex tracker!

I won’t be publicly sharing all of these results but I am curious to see how long I will stick to this thing. Especially when it comes to bible reading.

Well I have grown weary of typing this lol y’all have a good night or day or whatever it is and much love to you,

Dani