#Blogtober20 – Day 12

What was almost a normal day back to work was quickly shattered by the thought that I may not have a job. I went from moment to moment, waiting for a phone call. I called HR about seven times throughout the day and played phone tag with the lady.

As I wasted my day on my phone, reading social media posts, I questioned if this was how I wanted to live my life. I wanted to do my job and do it well, but I didn’t have the knowledge or capabilities to do so. I wasn’t about to pick up the phone until I knew I had a job, but even then I wasn’t sold on this job or the logistics.

I clocked out at 4:30 p.m. because it was after a hard day’s work and pay that I decided I couldn’t take this job any more. I went to my room to start blogging and next thing I know, I get another call from HR from my work. I answer and she declares I wasn’t fired after all, but had to set clear expectations that all leave of absences are approved by HR in the future and I needed to have these agreements in writing.

After she finished her spiel, I told her that I was putting in my notice and she asked me when I would like it to be effective and I said immediately. She said for me to return my equipment tomorrow and I stated I would and that was that.

Now I sit here, emotionally and physically exhausted. Emotionally due to the lack of having a purpose, let alone a job and physically my foot is more swollen than on surgery day. I’m not sure what the plan is now that I no longer have a job, but I know that I am going to try to have a more fulfilling job, which shouldn’t be too hard to find.

Financially, I am sitting pretty. I can probably take at least two months off and be fine. I don’t owe any bills until the middle of December, all my Christmas presents for others have been purchased and mailed to me, and I have a decent amount in savings and checking to get me through til I get my next job.

Maybe this is a true blessing so I can focus on my recovery from foot and knee surgery. Obviously if one day of doing nothing exhausted me, I can’t imagine a real day’s work at a new job. Maybe I will take off this next month so I can focus on my physical therapy and make sure I don’t bear weight on my bad foot.

Who knows what is going to happen, but I do know this: God is in control. He has me and isn’t going to lose sight of me; he has me by the hand and will guide me along this new journey. I shall have no fear because He is with me.

With that being said, I’m going to call it a night and drift off to sleep.

Much Love,

Dani