Masks and Casts

Image may contain: 1 person, sitting, living room and table

First full day of the recovery process. The unfortunate thing is that the numbing block in my ankle and leg is finally wearing off so not only does my knee hurt from the live transplant, now the inside of my foot is experiencing some intense aching and throbbing.

Of course my mom asks for my cell phone so she could take a picture of me in this state. To please her, I put it on Facebook for her own amusement. I took tylenol and some oxycodone which isn’t making me sick, but it’s making me super itchy which is an adverse reaction that narcotics don’t normally do to me.

I have been up and icing everything since 5 a.m. and I am still in pain. I keep trying to get up to go to the kitchen for snacks and to peruse the pantry, but then I realize I can’t grab a handful of snacks while using crutches. So my mom has been waiting on me hand and foot which is nice and all, but it leaves me terribly bored and helpless.

I want to just sleep through the pain, but I can’t because the pain is unbearable. I tried using the knee scooter but I can’t bend my knee at all with all the pain I’m enduring. So the crutches are my only option to get to and from the bathroom and after that, I am left exhausted.

My only other option for pain besides ice, elevation, and opioids is some edibles. I am taking one as we speak so the pain will go away and I can get some rest. These aren’t your regular edibles either, these are as heavy duty as they come, so hopefully I will get some rest and relaxation in the next hour or so.

Today I am in a mixed manic/depressive state. I want to go out and do shit but I know that isn’t possible, so I will somehow have to entertain myself here at home. I really want to paint or at the very least, draw. But all of my painting gear is upstairs and I can’t find the stylus for my tablet anywhere so I would have to draw by hand, which is a viable option, just not what I want to do.

My depressive state wants to feel sorry for myself and mope, but then my mom gets worried so I put on a mask, so to speak so she won’t worry about me. She has her hands full with taking care of me as it is. The last thing I need is for her to get anxious or depressed just because I am.

I’m feeling rather social today so my hopes are high that someone will come visit me or at least video chat me. I know that Brent is coming over around noon tomorrow to hang out with me. But that doesn’t help me right now. I feel a little buzzed from my medication, but it’s not really helping with the pain it just is getting my mind off the pain momentarily.

If any of y’all need a pen pal or want someone to talk to about anything and everything, I’m your girl! Comment below for my contact info.

As always,

Dani

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