Long time, no blog. It’s been one of those weeks where it has taken most of my energy just to go to work, come back home, eat, sleep, and repeat. Today I just couldn’t get out of bed. Not like it was this depression though. It felt like I was hit with a ton of bricks and I just could not shake it. I finally crawled out of bed in attempt to go shower, brush my teeth, and get ready for the work day ahead. After I was essentially ready to leave, I started to get a fever and started throwing up so I did the assholian thing to do in retail which is call out right before I was supposed to go to work.
When I called out, the guy was kind of pissed that I wasn’t coming in considering I was closing, but what are you gonna do? I have been sleeping on and off for most of the day. I tried eating a little bit, but now I’m feeling worse again. Tylenol has helped me keep the fever from getting worse. That reminds me, it’s time to take more so that I can try to go back to sleep.
If you are ever feeling inadequate for taking the time off you need whether it be for physical or mental illness, this post is for you. I feel as though it always lays on my own shoulders when I am incapable of fulfilling an obligation of some sort, which it technically does. Whether it be calling out of work or school or cancelling plans, I feel terrible that I am doing so and it shouldn’t be like that. There shouldn’t be a stigma for taking care of yourself. At the end of the day, a job ain’t gonna give a shit about you. It’s you who are responsible for taking care of you. A job or school or friends want a person who will somehow benefit them and you won’t be able to benefit anyone unless you can bring your best self to the table. That includes taking care of yourself even at the expense of others.
I am beginning to feel a little better now that I had a fever reducer, but my fatigue and muscle aches and nausea are still phasing me. But, better is better than no difference at all. Work may have not been happy with my choice in calling out sick, but I did this for me. I needed to take the time off because I know I could’ve “pushed through” at work, but who does that behoove besides a major corporation for profit purposes? Absolutely not me nor anyone else, especially if I were to get other people sick.
I am going to go rest now. But stay strong, all of ya’ll.