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“3… 2… 1… Happy New year!” Everyone chants this as the clocks change from the never ending year of 2020 to the new and hopeful year, 2021.

My New Years eve was spent ordering pizza delivery so I wouldn’t have to be out on the roads with drunk drivers and when Diego finally got home from work, we ate together, drank some, and watched Jeopardy! Nothing too crazy, but I enjoyed it very much so.

I have been thinking about what I want this new year to look like for myself and for those I love. I normally think it’s cliche to have new year’s resolutions, make them anyways, and then get angry at myself for breaking them 5 days into the new year. So I figured I would do the same this year, and try a little harder at trying to turn these resolutions into life changing habits and life style changes.

So here I list the things I would like to either reduce, eliminate, or add into my every day living.


I think this has to be the number one goal among most people for the new year; they want to start working out and eating better. I steadily gained 20 pounds in the first 8 months of the year and spent the last 4 diligently maintaining my weight because I had major surgery and knew I wouldn’t be able to move around at all, so I did my best at eating better when I was non weight bearing.

Now that gyms are closed for the next who knows how long, it makes it harder to want to work out. I know I could go outside but when you live in one of the rainiest areas of the US, it makes it impossible to go for a walk. However, this doesn’t excuse me from working out, nor should it. I know there is a plethora of YouTube videos I can work out to in the comfort of my own home. Just the motivation is lacking, but the desperation is there. I am weighing the most that I ever have in my life and it should scare me in wanting to go back into conscious eating and calorie counting and trying to get my steps in with my new FitBit.

I digress. I want to change. I have decided that I can only eat out once a week and every meal needs to be homemade and/or bought from the grocery store. This includes no fast food, no coffee or ice cream runs. No 11pm pizza delivery orders. I think if I can do this for a month, each month after that, I will add on a habit to kill/add for the following months so I can be held accountable for my actions.

January: No eating out. Exception: 1x a week (7 days) I may eat out whether it be pizza, fast food, etc. Otherwise, everything must be made at home or bought from the grocery store. Weigh myself twice a week, once on Monday, and once on Friday.

February: Calorie counting / Tracking food intake. Use My Fitness Pal to track what I eat which logs it into FitBit. This isn’t a diet, it’s conscious eating; being aware of what you put into your body. Log water intake. Goal is half my weight in water in ounces, so for me it 95 ounces of water per day. Continue January’s tasks as well.

March: Working out 3x a week for at least 30 minutes minimum. This can include walking, doing exercise videos, floor workouts, etc. Ease into this routine by not burning myself out too quickly on workouts that are too difficult. Continue doing prior month’s activities.

Talking about working out is getting me excited because I finally have a plan in place and hopefully here soon, I can buy some home gym accessories that I can put in my office to create a multipurpose room.

Things I need for a home gym: 3 sets of dumbbells, 2 kettlebells, a floor mat, a jumprope, a yoga ball, those step up boards used in aerobic classes, and the will to live through all of these exercises.

I managed to buy protein powder today, so the protein shake diet starts tomorrow…

Blog more

I want to be better about putting out content that is not only relatable, but is more about bringing awareness to bipolar disorder and other various mental health issues, not just a way to air out my life secrets.

Although, I do feel that through my vulnerability and transparency to readers in regard to all of my struggles this past year and prior to that, I have gained loyalty and trust with readers, old and new.

With that being said, hang on to your hats, ladies and gentlemen! There will be a whole lot of shenanigans happening here at Precarious Aquarius and I bet you wouldn’t want to miss it for the world 😉

Not to Gamble

I am currently on day 111 of not gambling, and I would like things to stay that way and for my numbers to only increase in days sober. I have been going to the grocery store nearly every day whether it be to see Diego or for whatever, and every time I do go in, the scratch ticket machine just stares me in the face. I just say, “Not today, loser!” and go on about my business. But I must admit, I still miss the thrill of the machines and the sounds each button made, the smells, the bells and whistles when bonuses were about to happen. It’s hard for me to let that all go and and to be content with the progress that I have made. But then I go home and hold my sobriety keychains and realize the momentary happiness that the casino brings me is nothing compared to the true joy I feel being back in my home, with Diego, regaining and rebuilding trust with those I love.

Life is hard enough and if I truly wanted to be miserable again, I would go gamble, but today isn’t that day and hopefully the urges I have lessen each day afterwards.

Quit smoking

Although I haven’t started this one yet, my goal is to quit smoking at some point this year. I chain vape like no other and although it has lessened since I started working again, I’m still smoking a high strength of nicotine almost as often as I breathe. Basically it’s like inhale, smoke, exhale, breathe, get a drink, smoke, exhale, sip drink, smoke, exhale, put drink down, smoke, ….you get the picture. That’s when I am home or at my parents’ house or I’m driving. At work, or in my sleep, I can go usually six hours without smoking. I just need to work on lowering my nicotine strength and slowly going longer and longer without smoking til I eventually stop.

It’s a whole process, but let’s see if it actually happens.

Quit drinking energy drinks

The only thing worse than my addiction to vaping is my red bull consumption problem. I bought coffee yesterday so I can drink coffee all day versus drinking red bull 2-3 times a day. Not only is Red Bull terrible for you, it’s too expensive. I have yet to start this trend as I sip on my delightful Red Bull as I type this, but once my four other Red Bulls are gone, I intend on not buying any more.

I think that’s all I have for new year’s resolutions. But I start my last quarter (hopefully, finger’s crossed) of community college tomorrow where I will complete two classes, English 102 and Math 097, which will complete my very first official year of college! It only took 4.5 years to get to this point, but at least I’m doing it. I am proud of who I have become and where I am going, and I ask God that this will be the year that I and those I love can prosper to the best of our ability not only physically, but emotionally and mentally as well.

Much love,


2 Comments Add yours

  1. Helen says:

    Happy New Year!! Best wishes on your goals!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. wanderingbipolarbear says:

    Good luck on your goals! You’ve got this!

    Liked by 1 person

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